We all want to have a healthy relationship with our partner, but it’s easier said than done. Being in a healthy relationship takes a lot of work and self-reflection. But if you’re reading this, then you’re willing to put in the effort. Here are 10 tips to improve intimacy in a relationship.
Have realistic expectations
I know, I know. You have this idea in your head of how you want your partner to be. But listen, what’s in your head isn’t reality. Healthy relationships mean accepting your partner as they are, not what you think they can be.
Work on your communication skills
People don’t have a problem with talking, they have a problem with communicating. And when it comes to relationships, communication is essential.
Do the following to help you communicate properly in your relationship:
- Take the time to be present
- Actively listen
- Ask questions
- Be vulnerable
By doing the above, it’ll helps partner’s bond and builds intimacy in a relationship.
Take care of yourself
The relationship can only be as healthy as you and your partner are. For intimacy in a relationship to flourish, take time for yourself. Practice self-reflect, communicate your needs and desires and spend time with your family and friends.
Every relationship has their arguments. We’re human.
Sometimes you’ll hear about couples who “never fight” and while it may sound like a dream, that’s not a good sign. Conflict isn’t always a bad thing and if you fight fairly and focused on resolution, it can propel your relationship forward.
But to achieve that you need to fight fairly. If you disagree, that’s fine. Here’s how to fight fairly:
- Cool down before talking
- Use “I” statements
- Use clear and specific language
- Focus on the issue
- Take responsibility for your role
- Know not all conflict will be resolved easily
If you keep the above points in mind, you’ll have constructive arguments.
No one really likes change, especially when it’s not on their terms. But in a healthy relationship, you need to allow room for growth and change.
Yes, you can be firm on your values, but for small or unimportant things, try to be flexible and see your partner’s point of view.
You cannot be in a healthy relationship unless you feel that you can be yourself. Why try to be someone else?
If you have a façade know that it won’t stay up for long. So why bother will all that work when you can just be you! Real relationships are made of real people.
Be someone they can rely on
Before you head to intimacy counselling, ask yourself this question: Am I someone my partner can rely on?
This is huge. Intimacy in a relationship starts with trust. Your partner needs to feel they can depend on you, that you’re someone they trust.
It’s easy to point out the negative things our partner does. But that doesn’t make for a healthy relationship. Instead of pointing out the negative instead, focus on positive affirmations.
So, if your partner does something positive, compliment them—that way, they’re more likely to do it again.
Push your partner up through positive affirmations.
Live a balanced life
While a healthy relationship means both partners can rely on each other, it also means that you two do things on your own. Go spend time with your family and friends. Go do your hobbies and interests. You don’t need your partner by your side for everything.
A healthy relationship is two independent people that choose to be together.
Remember, it's a process
Developing a healthy relationship doesn’t happen overnight. It comes with trial and error as you both discover yourselves and each other.
It takes time for people to learn how to communicate and practice those positive interactions with their partner. So give yourself time!
To develop a bond and intimacy in a relationship, there are many things you need to do. But, what’s important is you give yourself time and the opportunity for you and your partner to work on your relationship.